Tuesday, March 20, 2012

The List

Seems like it could do with a little updating, no?  Well, now that I have been in Sweden over a year, I can tell you that the unrelenting beautifulness in all directions at all times does fade a little bit, because I guess you get used to anything.  After a while, it's like "oh, there's another eight foot tall viking sex god.  Now what am I going to have for dinner... "  No, I didn't think it would happen to me either, but there you have it.

So sometimes its good to sit back, take stock, and really appreciate the fine specimens of Swedish manhood that exist.

Also, this very special edition of The List, is brought to you by OhioGirl Watching Movies and TV in Swedish.  *Takes bow*  You don't need to understand Swedish in order to appreciate the view!!

So, from the movie En Gång i Phuket which I saw in a movie theater!  In Swedish! 

A cutie and funny!  I give you Peter Magnusson.

From a series I have gotten into the habit of watching on a Sunday night (it's on before Damages) and I have figured out is to do with robots but not much else...

Andreas Wilson, with a younger, Swedisher, Tom Cruise kind of vibe going on.

And finally, not that I have been watching anything Swedish of him, but it would be rude not to include an old faithful:

Don't worry sweetie!  I haven't forgotten my first Swedish love.  I may look at the others sometimes, but I am always thinking of you!!

Friday, March 16, 2012


Which is really just regular old Friday, but I like the sound of free-day. Guess you can take the girl out of the US and all that! I guess I never realised before just how special our great constitution is to protect our right to think and say whatever we darn well please without hating and censorship. I guess I'm just a proud American! That is all I have to say about that.

After being so excited by days and days of sunshine (even if it was still pretty chilly), the last couple of days have been dull and depressing and reminding that we are still in the grips of winter for a little while yet. Winter in stockholm is just so loooooooong. I swear it has been more than just a few months since it was light and warm. I swear I've had at least two birthdays since then.

Actually I did have a birthday last week, yay me! It's not polite for a lady to tell her age, so let's just say it was a digit closer to Botox. Which actually I think I would be too scared to go through (I read it's actual poison - can anyone explain why it doesn't kill you through your skin???) but a digit closer to people smiling at me while thinking in their heads that I could use a little tweaking here and there. Although probably not so much in Sweden, you see a lot of "growing old gracefully" women here, I guess whatever floats your boat. I say whatever makes you look your best so you feel your best is a good thing. As long as it doesn't actually poison you, because there would be not much point in being hot and dead.

Monday, March 12, 2012

I know I said I was done...

... and I am I am!  But who needs an excuse to post a little Don Draper?

Don Draper Agrees With Me About Reality Stars

I knew that him and I basically agree on things.  This will be good for when we marry.


Since I decided I was going to stay here for a while (things might not have worked out like I thought, but no running home in defeat for OhioGirl!), I figured I should start to learn the language.  I mean, everyone speaks English (or at least think they do, they make more mistakes than they think but I guess I do in Swedish so its even!), but still there are times it is annoying not to know if people are talking about me, for example.

So I started taking lessons, and it's going okay.  Except, it's a REALLY frustrating language!  There are all these weird rules and strange pronounciations for things that it makes you understand why they all speak English!  I'm sticking it out because I'm not a quitter, but sometimes I really wonder why I bother.

For example, there is no word for "please".  How weird is that?  It is basic everyday courtesy and they don't even have a word for it - they say thank you.  So you would say "a coffee, thank you" instead of "a coffee, please", which doesn't sound as polite in my opinion.  And how to you teach kids their "please's and thank you's"?  You would have to teach them their "thank you's" and "thank you's"!!

And sometimes they say sentences backwards for no good reason I can see, its like the whole nation has that disease where you get words mixed up and curse for no reason.  Like, you say "now live I in Stockholm", which just sounds like you're trying to speak in Shakespeare or something (even though Shakespeare spoke English!) and should have a bugle and be like "hear ye hear ye, in the year of our lord 2012, now live I in Stockholm"!

I'm not disrespecting or anything, so please don't go crazy at me in the comments, I'm just sharing some observations as I take on this new challenge in my life.  Be I happy to live in this fair town, thank you!!

Friday, March 9, 2012

One Last Thing...

... To say about this stupid show and then I am done with it.  I'm sorry, a freaking mugging on the third day and some hot guy just happens to be right there to save her?  Whatever!  How stupid do you think we are?  If you'r going to do one of these fake soaps that pretend to be reality, you need to get someone who can act at least!

I couldn't resist taking a little peek around the website for it, what can I say I like a car crash!! And came across this: Recap.   Some stupid idiot who is clearly not capable of getting a real job so recaps bad shows for a living is slandering and and defaming me.  I think you'll find that calling someone a nutjob in a PUBLIC FORUM is illegal missy, and then to suggest that I was in some stupid liveblog with the airhead you think is worth a show being about when I have BETTER THINGS TO DO WITH MY TIME?  Yeah, you'll be hearing from my lawyers.

Whatever, I am so over all this.  Why do I keep getting caught up in drama after drama?  I just want to write a little blog about my crazy life in Stockholm and haters and fantasists just keep getting obsessed with me and writing about me - stop!  Why do you give me so much power!  I am just little old me.

Who passed my aniversary in Stockholm a few weeks ago btw, and also this blog aniversary!  Should have done something about it, sorry I didn't.  Caught up in real life as usual!  So a belated happy birthday and true thanks to all the GENUINE followers and internet buddies that I have made over one topsy turvy year!!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Don't Judge Me...

... but I freaking watched it again!  I know, I know, I can feel my brain cells melt and drip out my ears by the second, but sometimes you need a little junk in your life.  Umm, I don't mean like... *blushes*... moving swiftly on.

The floozie that I guess we're all supposed to think is super cool because she has her own show wakes up - surprisingly, alone, despite the fact that we all saw her get into a cab with her friend's boyfriend (classy).  At breakfast, we meet her roomie and friend Anna.  Now Anna, I can get on board with.  She is smart and classy and ladylike - everything her buddy Frida is not.  They talk a little bit, Anna tries to make Frida understand that coming home in the wee hours and selfishly waking everybody up is Not Cool, and Frida looks bored because no one is talking about her.  Then she goes out to have coffee with her brother, who is kind of a geek and seems to be mostly wondering what a camera is, going by the dopey way he stares right into it the whole time.  Frida whines her face off, he listens and looks like a dope.  The end.  Fascinating stuff.

Honestly, this is a problem that I'm finding again and again in Sweden.  You first come here and they seem to be all intellectual and cultured and, you know, smart.  Then you realize that actually it's just their accents and they are as airheaded and vapid as anybody else.

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

 Anyone remember this? 


She has her own show. She has my husband (not any more I don't think) and she has a DOCUSOAP about how amazing she is when really she is a husband stealing wh*reb*tchsl*t. Sorry, but sometimes cursing is all that will say what you need to with the strength it needs! And she is freaking boring and stupid! Why exactly has she been given a show can anyone tell me? There has to be about 17,000 better candidates for a reality show about their life, some of which haven't stolen people's husbands probably. Like these for instance:

So can anyone tell me one thing that is more interesting about blondie than any of these people? But they picked blondie. Approached her, so she says (though I wouldn't trust anything that twinkie has to say as far as I could throw an elephant). Is there no moral standards left in the world that people like HER become famous famewhore famoussons? Call me old fashioned but I think that there should be STANDARDS for people to get that kind of success, not that she actually has any – clearly she is yet another vapid airhead who let's just say I'm pretty sure that the producer of the show is a guy who doesn't think with the head on his shoulders, is all I'm saying.

Old friend...

 OH MY EFFING.... you will not believe what I just realized! What are you haunting me or something? Seriously? You have got to be kidding me world!

Monday, March 5, 2012

RealTales: Södermalm

What kind of ever loving hot mess was that? 

For ever and ever we have been BOMBARDED with PR about this incredible new web docu soap that is going to be amazing and innovative and unique and re write the rules of reality tv and whatnot and... some dinky famewhore in the ugliest boots I have ever seen in my life (seriously, I might not be able to get to sleep tonight after that disturbing sight) pranced around and got in a bitchfight over what I don't even know? Some dopey looking guy? Really ground breaking, we've never seen that before. 

Why cant we get docurealitywhatevers with some, I don't know, grown ups in them? I don't need to see some chicky who is about 12 and needs to eat a sandwich or eleven and grow a clue floating around like some pointless clothes horse who only comes to life when some dude looks at her. 

So yeah, I don't think I'll be watching again! Shame! Could have been good. Could have been something interesting. But instead, we got famewhore thy name is... whatever the heck her name was, I forget already.

Spring in the air!

Last night as I was walking to a date-type-thing (maybe later) I suddenly turned around and saw this and thought, I live in a pretty darn pretty town.  So often I get down on Stockholm (for good reason) that I forget it's good points.  Like:

1) All the water
2) It's getting lighter and lighter and lighter
3) The people are easy on the eye.  Weird and unsociable, but nice to look at.
4) It's clean.  Sometimes I think that little Swedish elves come out every night with mops and buckets and just sanitize the whole place.  I went to New York once and couldn't even enjoy it because all I could think of is the germs floating everywhere from all the filth.
5) Nobody bothers you, which some days is good.
6) Lots of hills (in Sodermalm anyway) which is good for the old booty
7) Candles in coffee shops.  Atmosphere and caffeine all in one!
8) The giant ships.  I dunno, they just tickle me.
9) Weird, not good, junk food in stores.  Also good for the old booty.  Now you know why Swedish people are skinny and hot!
10) Uhhh.... never running into any *ssholes from highschool or anything.  Can be good having a whole city/country/continent/hemisphere to yourself! 

Yayy Stockholm!

Thursday, March 1, 2012